Wednesday, December 8, 2010

Britney Spears Inspires Another 'Glee'-Cap Musical

Heather Morris' moves and John Stamos' grin have us breaking into song.
By Jim Cantiello

Britney Spears and Heather Morris on the set of "Glee"
Photo: FOX

From the Heather Morris-starring scene-for-scene video re-creations to the sight of Lea Michele as a sexy schoolgirl to the debut of John Stamos, this week's Britney Spears-themed episode of "Glee" has everyone talking. But it has us singing. Without further ado, here are the lyrics to this week's "Glee"-cap!

You took over this week's "Glee."
Oh, baby you can hit me
One or two more times.

But when you act,
It's all sorts of crazy wack,
It's so good to have you back,
Even though you look 39.

A full hour of hits that are yours,
But then Lea performed Paramore.
[Jim speaks: What the f--- was that about?]
Oh, Britney, take these kids on tour.

[Jim speaks: Seriously, Heather Morris did Britney better than Britney ever did Britney.
Clip: Santana says, "Leave Britney alone!"
Jim: Sorry!

[To the tune of "... Baby One More Time"]
Oh, Stamos, Stamos,
How was I supposed to know
That you and "Glee" are besties?
Oh, Stamos, Stamos,
You're not singing "Kokomo."
No love for Uncle Jesse.

Mating with crazy eyes,
They're dating,
Schuester's fading,
Student's masturbating,
Oh, that's gross!

John Stamos has a dentist chair.
He gives "Glee" kids
So much sweet air.
When they go under,
They lose their mind.
Drugs are sublime!
Then it becomes Britney time!

[To the tune of "Everytime"]
Videos redone
Are so much fun,
But baby

Everytime "Glee" tributes
The plot falls by the wayside.
They just want you to buy
lots more soundtracks, baby.

"Glee" is structured like a porn.
They talk and then perform.
Scenes are shoehorned
Who needs story, baby?!

[Jim takes a hit of nitrous oxide, collapses.]

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